Memories and Time Travel: Humanizing Dementia in “Wisdom Gone Wild”

Wind chimes brush against one another softly, their delicate notes mingling with the gentle hum of a woman lost in an aimless tune, as if chasing a distant melody. The screen before me reads, “We are continuously dying and being reborn.” 

Confronting the Wilds

Through 16 years of intimate footage, filmmaker Rea Tajiri chronicles the profound caregiving journey of her mother, Rose, as she grapples with the shadowy grip of dementia. Tajiri’s exploration becomes a window into the fragments of her mother’s identity, transforming home videos into inquisitive archives. These glimpses of memories provoke deep introspection, forcing us to question our understanding of those closest to us. How well do we truly know our loved ones?

Tajiri digs into the murky tapestry of her family history, uncovering their lives as humble strawberry farmers who wandered transiently across California’s farmlands. From the family’s discarded and newly designated names, a story of struggle and resilience emerges — a story that evolves from the challenges of assimilation in America to the endurance within the confines of incarceration camps, a dark chapter in American history.

Wind chimes continue to rustle softly, and a haunting cry emerges from Rose, her voice piercingly calling out, “Akiko!” 

Akiko is Rose’s real name; Rose is regressing to her original being. As the Tajiri family desperately reaches out for Rose, she reaches back for Akiko — a woman who, in a sense, no longer exists. Interwoven with dream-like sequences, the careful implementation of chimes and natural sounds places us in the frame of mind to contemplate Rose, or Akiko, and the reality she inhabits. We can only interpret or assume the nature of her experience. What defines reality, and how can we share our realities with someone seemingly existing in another time and place?

“The film is about aging and who we are at different stages and moments across the span of a lifetime. Dealing with a parent who has dementia, many aspects of their past, their life story, surface,” explains Tajiri In an interview with Bomb Magazine. “Out of that, I wanted to weave this specific element into the film that would show aspects of a parent’s life and how a child might remember them across a lifetime.”

The music in Tajiri’s documentary is immersive and intentional, inviting us into Rose’s perspective and dissolving the boundaries between one plane of reality and another. As I sit by my mother’s side, and Tajiri by hers, communication is reduced, we can only contemplate the true nature of their experiences.

Dementia in Cinema

When it comes to portraying the challenges of dementia on screen, what we often encounter are glamorized misconceptions or common stereotypes of this complex condition. Take, for instance, “The Notebook,” an iconic Nicholas Sparks film that tells a romantic tale of enduring love between two attractive protagonists. While this passionate story aims to inspire hope, this love-cures-all approach is met with derision by those in my Alzheimer’s Caregivers support group. To suggest that someone can suddenly “become themselves” again, as if a switch in the brain were flipped, is not only hilariously untrue, but also insulting to devoted caregivers. Memory loss, one of the most common symptoms of dementia, is often used as a clichéd tool to concoct dramatic narratives.

Having witnessed the slow and excruciating progression of this affliction over the past decade with my own mother, I can attest that the reality of day-to-day life is relentlessly demanding, tumultuous, and ever-evolving. There are no bright moments of clarity simply by retelling your love story enough times to flip that switch.

A more accurate representation of dementia can be found in the grandmother character in “Coco.” Music, long studied as a catalyst for memory recollection, is documented to have miraculous benefits for many people. While this movie delves deeper into the nuances of dementia, it is still a family-friendly movie that portrays dementia in a feel-good glow with elevated dignity and softened afflictions.

Tajiri takes a different approach. She does not paint an excessively somber portrait of grief and loss, which dementia is undeniably full of. Yes, this condition is rife with heartache, and most stories surrounding the topic are saturated in it. However, many people are uncomfortable facing the inevitability of mortality and the potential loss of one’s sense of self. They dismiss the challenges faced by the elderly as something far off in the distance. The social stigma surrounding dementia and the discussion of caretaking is shrouded by our limited understanding of it. But what happens when we choose to alter our perception and response?

“When someone you’ve known your whole life begins to transform through dementia, it can be frightening. It is a painful and profound loss. Sometimes it feels like their neuroses and their fears are amplified too, which can be extremely frustrating. The person loses abilities that they never gave a second thought to,” Tajiri elaborates. “So one day I thought, what if I give in to her behavior? What if I accept the reality she’s creating? What if I don’t judge it? When I let go, it was surprising what worlds she would build.”

Unraveling the Wisdoms

Tajiri approaches documenting her mother with sensitivity, allowing her to exist in her own space and participating in what she describes as “dream logic” — where the planes of reality and dementia intertwine. The documentary itself unfolds in a non-linear format, instead as a collage of blurred consciousness, investigations, and anecdotes from Rose and Tajiri’s experiences. It weaves together a dream fabric, delicately merging the past and the present, truths and fiction. This storytelling approach captures the mysterious facets of dementia, at times revealing shockingly coherent and detailed recollections. It challenges us to view dementia not solely as a cognitive decline but as a cognitive rediscovery, an untethered self “gone wild.”

Rose becomes a time traveler, traversing time and space through her “heart radio,” communicating with her ancestors and her younger self. Tajiri accompanies her, entering a world filled with dramatic outbursts and child-like playfulness, meeting Rose as she once was and Rose who might have been. She patiently listens to spiritual and philosophical beliefs, both old and new, and harmonizes with Rose’s spontaneous serenades. Tajiri discovers a profound connection with her mother, one that could not have been possible before, through a duet of creation across time.

Talking about Dementia

When it comes to discussing dementia, particularly within immigrant families, caring for aging parents is not only common but expected. However, films focusing on Alzheimer’s or dementia often miss the mark by portraying affluent families with comfortable support systems, neglecting the experiences of working-class, immigrant, or BIPOC families. Most stories go untold. 

Tajiri takes matters into her own hands. She proves how perspective can change with experience, and her use of raw footage feels intimate and purposeful. Especially in the era of the COVID pandemic, when dementia-based services were deprioritized and downsized, the importance of this dialogue must be amplified and humanized. We need a more systematic approach to reshape society’s view of dementia and aging. By normalizing public conversations around dementia, we can strive for a societal shift in how we regard our elders and treat them with the humanity they deserve.

Tajiri offers a different lens through which to consider individuals affected by dementia. She encourages reality to be perceived as more fluid and to embrace the little joys that redefine what it means to be and feel alive.

“Wisdom Gone Wild” depicts the lives of dementia sufferers and their loved ones as a poetic meditation on life and a poignant reflection on mortality. It reveals the unreliability of memory and the desire to recreate one’s experiences as a new truth when our memories begin to haunt us. Rather than shy away from the uncomfortable truth of who we might become when we are no longer “ourselves,” we can embrace it as part of our continuing transformation.

The trailer for “Wisdom Gone Wild” can be viewed here. For more information, visit Rea Tajiri’s website or on Instagram at @wisdomgonewildfilm.